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A 20-year-old currently taking up Pharmacy. Of life updates and random writings. My ups and downs, my thoughts and nonsense.

February 09, 2016

#71

Years since you left. Or I left. Or we both parted ways.

It's true when you said "time will heal you". It still hurts here and there, it does, but I guess what time can't heal, I have to heal myself.

It's just that.. I miss you as a person. Not what we had, not what we were. I just... miss talking to you. All I see in you now is somebody I no longer know. Never thought one year could make us this much apart. As much as I miss talking to you, I also know you've walked too far to come back. Too far to even look back.

I hope you're always safe wherever you are. I hope you have someone to look out for you. Care for you. Listen to you. And maybe love you. Because you totally deserve that (not that you're not able to do that for yourself but yea it's always good to have someone)

I can't afford to hate you. Because you taught me a lot of things. I was blind. I was naive. I was silly. I know I've hurt you a lot. I thought that'd make you come back. But I pushed you away. I was wrong.

But now is not the time to contemplate what had happened. (Now is the time to sleep). I still care about you, I do. And if I ever hear bout you with someone else, my heart would still drop. But I'm learning that this is meant to be. Although I have yet to discover the reasons/lessons behind this, I accept this wholeheartedly. Maybe you deserve someone better, just as much as I deserve someone better. Maybe God has something better planned for our future. And til that day comes, I pray the best for you.

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